I really should update this thing more often, id like to get in the habit.. i almost said again, but id be lying, tons of good shit happened that i should of uppdated with, but too bad, shoulda woulda coulda.

so todays episode: I'm sure this kind of thing has happened to everyone, ill retell the two real instances of this happening to me.

so today we were just chilling out, and if you didnt know, its hot as hell. especially in the classes, brookfield is a tad ghetto and only a few rooms are air conditioned. Library, office, guidance and learning strategies. so alec megan and i, mostly alec and i, were just bitching and we walked by the learning strats room, and were were talking before about how our school is getting an autistic unit of about 15 kids. we were thinking theyd get the learning strats room, because theyd probably function much better if they were comfortable. so we both drew a simultaneous " damn tards" or something along those lines as wouldnt get the air conditioned rooms for shit next year. so i had autism on the brain.

   In english class, theres me in the back, megan in front, samar on the left, and  jesse pangborn in front of meg. Jesse was just being herself and kinda goofing around , acting like an idiot and just having a good time, so I said she was borderline autistic. she looked at me like she didnt hear me, and as shes come into the habit of making fun of people shell draw her arms into her chest and be an idiot, so i drew my arms into my chest, screwed up my face and had a little pseudo seizure.  then later, megan comes up to me and she says "maybe you should lay off the autistic jokes with pangy." I asked why and she told me her brother is autistic...fuck.. i felt so bad, i really hate genuinely making people feel bad.

second instance

In grade 9, in my geography class, we had a peer tutor and he was chill, dont remember him at all really except for this, think he graduated that year. well we had like 20 minutes free time at the end of a geo class and we jsut started hating on each other, all in good fun.  like we were calling each other cocksuckers and blood belching vaginas etc

     So i said something along the lines of " i had sex with your mother" he sombers up right quick and says my mothers dead. I thought hes just fucking with me, people do that all the time, just to find out later they were just fucking with you, so  i replied with

"I guess thats why she didnt move around alot."

first off, fuck grammar and spelling.
(note the deterioration)
   
   So  I went to toronto with Kayli on thursday to sunday, lots of fun. the train didnt totally suck, but i  made sure to fucking hustle to the backseat for that single outlet for my laptizzle. Yoshis island is awesome. so when we got there i was all lets hit up young street and such. pretty much went around laughing at sex shops and porno theatres...and got cold. next day, went to the eaton centre and  saw an eb and games workshop which was cool,. saw tekken 5 for.... $64.99....damn, especially as i was planning on buying it myself. so kayli and i went hunting for this arcade, primarily so i could get mirkd by asians in the span of 8 seconds. we ewnded up actually having alot of fun playing racing games, which surprised me. we played pac man, mario, zombie shooters.. and fighters.now it may or may not be true, i cant say, but kayli may have beaten me having never played a fghter for more than ten minutes. snap i forgot, there was a little brawl in the arcade, like 5 people, foir the sake of description and description alone 3 were black two were white, adn it seemed to consist of a girl  saying to another girl something about taking money or something. things were said, not specifically this, but with the with same attitude and incoherance.

"fuck yo couch nigga." 

   one of the girls was then knocked to the ground and then promptly had her organs kicked in  repeatedly. i didnt want to interrupt or ontervene rather, as i wasnt in the mood to get stabbed, these guys were crazy, so the managers took care of it, and i then spent another 20$ on shitty games i enjoy. ( tekken 5 is good, yoshimisu is chillio as is bust-a-move)

   we then just went down the town and headed into a sex shop. i love porn. i love sex. i love sex shops. just so its known and i dont surprise anyone. i saw some of the whackest shit. like 35 inch double headed dildos with the diameter of my fist.  I thought this was just awesome in how ludicrous/inventive it is, its called a fleshlight.  you get caught with that and your instantly labeled a crank beast on the go. jujst general weird/ awsome things.

   there was also this "salzaban psychic extreme" so we thought, why the fuck not, lets go for a laugh and huck ten bucks for a palm reading or something. so there we are and this very depressed looking woman walks out afte r helping her kid out with a computer game and tehn says hello and offer her services, wich were as follows.

tarot card reading- i think theres a little to it, but as far as a psychinc goes, not that whack

palm reading- i think its pretty illegit, but whatever, its a classic

crystal ball- crystal ball?! whats up fucking merlin.

   after crystal ball i was like holy shit and couldnt not laugh a little, so i ask her how much. I was thinking 10-15$, she spits 30$.  so fuck it.

   I aslo went to china town, which is much more awesome than china street  here. It actually had  dried squid and octopus just sittign open to the element on a rack outside, thats pretty legit. so the first shop i go into is nothing but anime and such, i proceed to buy 17 posters and spend the majority of my money. i had to rep astro boy and got two as he was like as my mother describved it when she saw em on my wall  as "my childhood idol next to the ninja turtles". os we promptlky headed out so we still would have a little cash. went to the kensington market and stopped by a ocuple shops and such.

   later on saturday night, i went to my first porno. it was different then i thought it would be. kayli wanted to get smashed and go. but we couldnt get any booze. so we were banking on  me lookin 18 and them forgiving her  that she was turning 18 the next day, which she actually was. nobody actually asked, just put in 5 bucks, and roll through. there were two theatres
-college sluts 8-
-xxx super porn stars awesome or something.

   so we go into college sluts 8. kayli dares me to take it out, which i do. btw there are 2 rows of 6 vertical to the screen, another row of six, aisle, then two more rows of six. were sitting in the back, two other guys are in there in various rows. she startrs touching it and such , then all of a sudden this guy just pops out the backdoor and looks around. guess to see if anyone was cranking it or anything, so i was like damn, im putting my shit back in my drawers. or trying to at least, and the guy pops out again, this happens like 4 times so i think  theres a camera in their or something. i eventually get it back in adn we move to the second theatre, exact same  layout, totally different flick though.

   so theres this guy in nohing but a silver suit, shoes and all with the crotch cut out wearing this big fucking helmet, like two feet in diameter, hes fuckign like this schoolgirl/farmers daughter all made up with  plastic surgery and crazy makeup. things happen in porn as they  usually do, and as hes just lying there, the chick takes off his helmet after she goes down on him, and the guy dies. the next set is this guy bringing in this beutiful naked  chick in his arms layse her on a bed and walks back to this cupboard or som ethign and puts on the same  helmet as the dude before, proceeds to space walk, going all darth vader with the breathing.  he gets to her, and she motions him to go down on her, still wearing the big fucking helmets he puts his head between her legs and laps against the glass of the helmet. the chick goes what the fuck and tells him to take it off, so he inhales, takes it off, and goes down on her for ten seconds, then runs back to the helmet puts it on and hyper ventilates, catches his breath,  and  does this like 6 times. all the while a pretty gross overweight guy is jacking off liek ten feet away...... so thats that story, we left after that.

   that pretty much concludes what i can remeber of the trip right now.

   i lopped off like 3/4 of my hair though. so i guess im the gay vampire no longer.  the lynch pin on top  of it looking ratty, me being tired of it, needing a job and wwvsd? was the fact while in T.O.  i was looking for directions to the ROM, and like as i went up to people to just say "excuse me" they would look and shuffle off real quick. so im thinking, if i look like suchj a degenerate people think im panning for cash by just saying excuse me, im not getting a job any time soon.

   so fuck it.

while i remember,  AG dropped what im not sure could be taken as a batti confession.

so were in anthro class right, talking about media and body image and such. so we talk about how girls get eating disorders and feel like shit, and also how men feel inadequate and pressured as well. So Mr. Fortier is like

" what kind of person could a guy see and try to emmulate, because of the messages he gets from the media?"

although AG was first, everyuone else was like actors, athletes etc. Ag shot up his hand and said

"Vin DIesal."

I dunno why, just struck me as funny. I know he doesnt read this blog, i should get him a VIn Diesel calander for his birthday.

         Conor and i were talking  about university and about how if i could get to western, and we roomed on the same floor right, wed each have a room in very very close proximity in a suite kinda situation. So we move both beds into one room,  hook up the second desk and  maybe a printer we can set up our laptops with.  pretty much gut the second room and make it one for sleep and school functions. with the empty second room, we put in a couch, couple tv's a big desktop pc for gaming, posters, get a cd player, some consoles, and just have it as the "chill room". Like straight chillin, how many  people have their almost private, although small, lounge? it would be too chill. ALthough id be waaay too tempted to get a wipe board to put on the door and  interchange sayingings like "no wankers allowed."

The game got mirked!
without your g-unit hookup i wont have top look at your facial paralysis anymore mother fucker!

hey now that your a big star, maybe you can give me a hookup, i can put eucalyptis oil in my eye and rap, i really can, check it.

I hate those more succesful than me, uh
i steal your shit, and impregnate your girlfriend, uh
you have no talent "game", how do you like that, huh?

 

How to Make a Pro-Ana Website
• Define the Religion: Always include The Ana Creed, The Ana Prayer, and The Thin Commandments. These are easily found through a search on google.
• Tips and Tricks: Help other girls escape detection, keep from eating, burn more calories, and pretend they enjoy hunger.
• Use lots of pictures: These may include at least one picture of Kate Moss or Calista Flockhart on each page. Intersperse with other beautiful, perfect models, but do not forget the "trigger" pictures of ugly, fat women! (And make sure all of the pictures are of Caucasian people.)
• Be White.
• Include your daily Diary. This will show people you are suffering and artistic, but it will also help you in your quest for disappearance if you write down everything you eat, and all the calories you burn every day.
• Thinspirational Quotes. These may include all those pithy quotes about dieting your Mom taught you ("Nothing tastes as good as Thin feels!" and "A Moment on the Lips, Forever on the Hips!"), but do not forget! "There is no TRY. There is only DO!" (The great sage Jedi Master, Yoda.)
• Poetry, Poetry, Poetry!
• Draw lots of pictures of faeries, and spell it F-A-E-R-I-E.

Pardon me , but im having trouble resetting the font. ive been seeing some programs on tv recently  about anorexia subculture. it is fucking weird.  like see above, the guides seem like contrived manuals for depression and insecurity, what retardted reinforcement. "in clude your daily diary. this will show people  you are suffering and artistic"

wtf?? that is whack              "pretend they enjoy hunger"?

it really sounds weird to me, like although i dont really agree with eating disorders as an outlet for anything really, it seems like these people arent even doing it for themselves at all.  Its like this brainwashing with confines and rules, what a cult. what skewed gratification.

it even calls it a religion.  it's weird how even self inflicted deprivation requires a manual and code of ethics.
what a whack world we live in

                                                                                                                                              

1. Full name:  Dana Jacob (Jakob) Tenzing Purcell
2. Nicknames:  dane, dan purcell, gay vampire, sugarcrisp whore
3. Eyes: piercing
4. Height: like 5 10.5ish
5. Hair:  dyed black and long
6. Siblings:  4all half brothers and a half sister, so im a compilation of failed marriages if you will
7. Do you like to sing in the car?   i dont sing
8. Do you like to sing in the shower? actually i do, scratch 7
9. Do you like to sing in the toilet?  wtf?
11. Sign: i can't spell, aquarius
12. Address:  ladys, write this down, 1109 apolydor ave, 1140 fisher ave,#902, and  this little crib on quesnel.
13. Sex:  male
14. Righty or lefty:  if its a sport, generally left, although i throw right
15. What do you want most in a relationship?  to just chill
16. Have you ever cheated?  i plagerized my  assignment on plagerizm
17. Martial status: married
18. Do you have a car (if so, what is it)?  i have many.
19. What kinda car do you want?  umm a hearse would be cool, put a little futon in the back a tv and a coupe consoles, would be chill

FAVORITE QUESTIONS:
20. Movie:  i dont have one favorite
21. Song: dont have on e favorite
22. Band/Singer: i think i could listen to the dresden dolls all day
23. TV Show: Trek.
24. Actor: Never thought about it.
25. Actress:  not really
26. Food: my dad makes wicked french toast
Number:  dont really have one
28. Cartoon:  Probably a WWII propaganda one, transformers......some stupid teletoon ones i guess
29. Disney Character:  dunno
30. Colour: smoke grey

LOVE LIFE ETC:
31. Do you plan on having children: a maggot in my own image, im good for now, thanks
32. Do you want to get married:  not really
33. How old do you want to be when you have your first child:  see above
34. Would you have kids before marriage: id rather not, but i wouldnt think of it any differently
35. Do you have a b/f or g/f?:  yes
36. Do you have a crush:  tragically no
EITHER-OR (PICK WHICH ONE YOU PREFER)

37. Music/TV:  um i watch more tv than i do listening to music, but i would say i like it more
38. Guys/Girls: girls.....but my boys....i dunno
39. Green/Blue: Green
40. Pink/Purple: purple
41. Summer/Winter:   im good with the summer stuff
42. Night/Day:  im actually more of an evening person
43. Hangin Out/Chillin:  providing theres a fucking difference, "chillin" im a sucker for applying "ebonics"
44. Dopey/Funny: funny
45. Flirty/Playa:  what can i say
46. What school do you go to?  brookfield...woot
47. Ever been drunk? Not really.
48. Have you ever taken drugs? No. square central here
49. What's a major turn on for you? an attractive girl in a skirt..with no inderwear
50. How far would you go on a first date?  .......
51. Should people come out and say what they mean more often? No. it would cause more than a few problems
52. Which person do you trust and are open with the most?  not really anyone in the impression im getting from the question, but ive got a few
53. What do you think of soul mates? Lucky them.
54. Is it right to flirt if you have a bf/gf?  to lead by example, yes
55. What was the last thing you cried over?  i think my mum yelling at me
56. What's something about guys/girls you don't get?  nothing crazy
58. Why? /
59. What's an object you can't live without?  internet. im also a porn demon 
60. Love or Lust:  love, but lust is fun
61. Silver or gold:  wearing too much gold means you are gay
62. Diamond or pearl: Diamonds, nothing but bling bling in yo face
63. Sunset or sunrise: Sunsets evening person
64. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping: i have
65. Do you sleep with stuffed animals:  i sleep with a realdoll sometimes
66. Do you have any piercings: 4 in fact, all in my head, im aware of how retarded they are
67. What colour underwear are you wearing right now?  black
68. What song are you listening to right now?  just watching much, destiny's child black and white video, theres this commercial ass nigga with gold teeth and teardrop tattoos thats super whack.
69. What are the last four digits of your phone number?  2052 i think
70. Where would you want to go on your honeymoon? some place with ceiling mirrors
71. Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with?  me homies
72. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex: obvious aside, trying to find out if they keep it real
73. Favourite sport to watch: Hating.
74. What makes you happy?  games girls, dead things, trek, hating, my crew, hating my crew. the list goes on
75. What's the next cd/s you're going to get? that damn dresden dolls cd
76. Do you wear contacts, glasses, or neither? neither, im a lyrical optometrist with 20/20 vision
77. What's the best advice ever given to you?  i dunno
78. Have you ever won any special awards?  nothing that wasnt just drawn from a hat
79. What are your future goals? i plan on being a psychologist, passing more games, and owning every season of next gen and voyager
80. Worst sickness you ever had?  im just a fucking frail human being
81. Funny or Scary movies better? Funny normally
82. On the phone or in person?  person.
83. Hugs or kisses?  white chocolate is good, i really like the ones with that little chocolate swirl in them.
84. What song seems to reflect you the most? nothing
85. If you died tomorrow who would you leave everything you own to?  just one person...damn
86. Do you have any enemies? not really
87. What is your greatest fear? that noone likes me in high school, theres nothing to lose
88. Would you rather be rich or famous? Rich, fame would blow
89. What time is it in Albania now?   i dont give a fuck, probably like 5:30 am?
90. Have you ever been in love? Always.
91. Have you ever believed in Santa? not really
92.  is conor a whack m.c.? yes
93. Last time you talked to a person that you like: A few minutes ago.
94. Do you have any pets? Mr. jones, jayjay, and i guess a snakke named nifty
95. Last time you were depressed: next tiem you catch me in a car in shop class
96. Are you an alcoholic?  no, i have a shitty liver
97. Who sent this to you?  found it on conor's blog
98. What do you think of this person?  keeps it real
99. Do you want your friends to write back?  i dont give a fuck, sure, why not

 this is pretty much so my blog doesnt become abandoned web trash.

oh man conor and i are too hateful, i love chilling with ol'vansmack, the hates a good portion of it see here, check the sidebar. that was my first link.

i love watching theres nothing to lose, its such a great video.

 as the title woul suggest, a chick steps to this. so im wotrking outside of the art room like i usually do doing random things, and this grade ten girl, also named dana, was talking to this guy named ryan. so then when i walk up as im working with ryan, shes like

"there are so many rumours about you"
totally interested, im like...well?

"well for one, i hear you drink the cat girl's blood"

(i swear if i hear gay vampire)

so im like ...you mean cassandra (girl i chill with everyone call kat)

Name: Dana Jakob (Jacob) Tenzing Purcell, one of my names is after a sherpa, can you guesss which one?
Birthplace: Ottawa
Current Location: My mothers basement, in ottawa...all alone
Eye Color:  blue, very
Hair Color:  recently dyed black
Height:  5"10.5 im like shaq niggah
Righty or Lefty: Right.
Zodiac Sign:  aquari....fuck i cant spell....

Personal motto: keep it real.
Favourite place: i dont really know, always like a warm bed, im pretty partial to blakes residence.
Favourite song:  maybe a dresden dolls song
Favourite writer:  chuck palunhuik butchering the speling of his last name
One word to define yourself:  id like to hope im more complex than one word could define. i hear indifferent alot

Your heritage:  euromut, i dont even really know, a couple european countries that no longer exist.
Shoes you wore today:    my frankenstein boots with inch platform.Your fears:  no clue
Your perfect pizza:  ag's got me hooked on the stuffed crust, cheese pepperoni, a few black olives
Favourite food:  i like thai food, da makes wicked steak....some pasta...i cant answer the question very well
Goal you`d like to achieve: be happy in the long run.
Listening to a song at this moment:  big white world, marilyn manson.....my wrists are so dirty!! etc...
Your most overused phrase on MSN:  hmmm. yeah... meh
Your thought first waking up:  "fuck"
Your best physical feature:  my eyeballs most likely, or my sickly yellow skin
Your bedtime:  10-2
Your most missed memory:  maybe iim just retarded, or im thinking about this question too literally..
Pepsi or Coke: Coke,  straight up
McDonald's or Burger King: sall the same to me

Single or group dates: Single if you actually want to connect, group if you dont really want to do it
Adidas or Nike:   adidas
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:  i just like iced tea
Chocolate or vanilla:  good question..... totally on the mood.
Cappuccino or coffee:  up until recently i would of sai i dont really like either...but walking into conor's place at one in the morning frigid as  a nun, and im offered this great  coffee, changed my life. also the coffee dib makes me..which means its spiked.

DO YOU
Smoke: nope,...i dont wanna jack vansmacks style
Cuss:  depends on the company really, when tact isnt really required and i can just spit..like a sailor

Take a shower:  ........yes?
Have a crush:  why not, more than a crush though, aww im so soft
Like(d) highschool:  school is school, i just reallly dont like most of the peopel, just dont find them...theyre just idiots.
Want to get married:  i'm sure the answer will change, but im leaning on no right now
Believe in yourself: confident in what i do, i know myself, doesnt mean ill do the best things, but sall good
Think you're attractive:  yeah, but im no AG
Think you're a health freak: No.
Get along with your parents:  kinda....not really too much of  a relationship, a tad shallow maybe, but it works
Get along with your siblings:  i guess, i dont see them ver oiften, theyre all at least a decade older than me, so theres nto really anything  to fight about

 to "mc" is not an instrument

IN THE PAST MONTH
Drank alcohol: Yeah. It was New Year's, remember?
Gone on a date:  not really
Bought a CD:  50 cent record, nas stole my money
Eaten sushi:  no, bu t i wouldnt mind
Been dumped: nope
Gone skating: I have actually....
Gone skinny dipping:  shower...as clsoe as it gets with another pewrson
Dyed your hair:  all natural here
Stolen anything:  nope


This is supposed to say "Have you ever:", but Conor screwed the formatting up and can't fix it.

Played a game that required removal of clothes:  it was summer camp

Been drunk or extremely intoxicated:  yeah......
Been caught "doing something":  too many things toi mention
Gotten beaten up:  yup, i used to all the time
Shoplifted:  not really
Changed who you were to fit in:  how else can i ever be accepted?!

Age you hope to be married:  dead

Number of Childen:  im good on the front of havin wormlings
Describe your dream wedding:  as long as it ends in a place with ceiling mirrors
How do you want to die: midshag wouldnt be bad
Where you want to go to college:  ottawa u get a phd in psych
What do you want to be when you grow up:  pyscholoman
 

What country would you most like to visit: japan would be too chill

IN A GAL/GUY
Best eye color: I never really cared, actually. ithings are interesting, green eyes are really catching though

Best hair color:  meh
Short or long hair:  as long as its not likee over three feet, sall good, and festers just fine.

Height:  im a sucker for short chicks
Ethnicity:  i like em brown porderican or hation, ive even tapped form the zooloo nation..im sucha bad human bbeing...who cant spell
Best weight:  as long as you wouldnt describe yourself in a personal ad as "heavy set"
Best articles of clothing:  kind of a whole package deal, i like pants,
Best first date location:  bubblicity... pennies is what ive got, the conversations good, you can just run off wherever whenever after, its good.
Best first kiss location:  whrever, just quick and playful

Number of drugs taken illegally:  0

Number of times you got your heart broken:  umm, crushed like an emo video, 0
Number of hearts you`ve broken:  not sure, a couple ive been told
Number of people I could trust my life with:  i m thinking me, no offecne, actually one or two
Number of CDs that I own:  most of mine got jacked when my brother kdedt em on a plane, si iv egot like 20
Number of piercings:  eyebrow, 2 helix, one lobe
Number of tattoos:None.
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper:  nobody loves me
Number of scars on my body:  nothing with a real story
Number of things in my past that I regret:  i make a point not to regret anything

i know thiss will sound rather....homosexual, but whatever

so im presenting my art isu today, its a 20 minute presentation on the renasainnce, and im talking aobut  michalangelos david, so as im talking about the sculpture. i intended to say
" so you can see the artist created elaborate and enormous pieces"
what i actually said

whatsw up, i actually had a fair bit to spit...too bad i forgot.

so im on math class right, and i overhear this girl .  nermine(middle eastern), and she was talking about how she doesnt like it when